People show you who they are

So pay attention to what they do, not what they say, when building your team

One of my very best friends has been dating a guy for close to a year. What do I know about him? Not a lot since distance, schedules, and a pandemic have kept us from meeting in person. But, for one thing, I know that I would likely want to hire him for any job, even if I had to invest in training on the technical aspects of the job.

How do I know this having never met him? It’s because he shows through his actions that he is creative, motivated, and has follow through, even though the path to achieve his desired results is difficult. People’s actions show who they are, and just like a great novelist “shows” and doesn’t just “tell” about the story, great team members show who they are without having to tell you. Those behaviors and actions that combine to form “soft skills” are the critical element in creating a high performing team.

Creative thinkers tend to be creative in everything

Show me a person who thinks differently about how things are done or common problems, and my first response is, find that person a job here! I love hearing about the “other lives” of team members, whether it is designing quilts, building robots, or making an album. Those same people, who have the ability to see something that isn’t there today and work toward it with gusto (often without any immediate reward), will approach the challenges of business in the same way. So don’t poo poo that musician, liberal arts grad, or art history major, even if you are hiring for an accounting or systems role. 

Motivation should be inherent

Self-directed motivation is often the differentiator between a good employee and a great one. Does this person look around the “universe” of work and find things that need to be done to improve the company, or do they assume they are “on the bench” unless given specific assignments? If I meet someone who has run their own business, written a novel (even if it’s self published), or created a product that wasn’t there before, I know they are motivated to get the job done. Without evidence of motivation, the best you can hope for is to inspire motivation in the person, which is really difficult to do. More likely, as we like to say in the South, “that dog won’t hunt.”

Image courtesy of olginaa84 from Pixabay.

Confident people surround themselves with people who aren’t like them, and who are good at the things they are not.

Just like a band…..creating a team requires a lot of complementary skill sets and perspectives, working together for one goal. Mick Jagger and Charlie Watts were vastly different, yet that difference allowed them to make great music for more than 60 years. In the workplace, leaders often forget that they are assembling something very much like a band or orchestra. I have noticed that non-confident leaders tend to want to know the most about every area, aka the “I play every instrument on the album” model. Can you imagine going on tour with that person, the one who “knows” how everything should be played? Do you think they are attracting the very best musicians for their touring band when there is no room for creativity or playing the songs another way? Rather, the confident leader is one who says, I have a drummer, I have a bass player, but now I need a lead guitarist, and that’s not me either. The whole is then greater than the sum of the parts and can lead the team to legendary “music.”  

People who follow through on commitments and manage distractions are the glue that holds everything together

Making an album is hard. It is harder when life gets in the way. I know that my friend’s fella has a family to take care of, and a full time job. Yet, he finishes projects, including making an album, and does not seem to get distracted by the complexities of day to day life. Not to mention he always finds time to make my friend feel special. That is the hallmark of a great team member: the person who does what they say they will do, without making excuses, and brings the rest of the team along for the ride. No weak links here! Whether they go to school at night, coach their kid’s softball team, take care of aging parents, or run seven side businesses, the people who can keep momentum when distractions and competing interests abound are the ones you want on your team.

And that part about making others feel special, people show you who they are in life too.

Who you choose to spend your life with, even if it is just you by yourself, matters more than anything else

Several years ago, I was up for the biggest job of my life. The competition was fierce, and I was not the obvious choice. Every day, my soon-to-be-husband would ask me, “what did you do to get that job today?” And when I would say something like “well, I did some contracts, blah blah blah” his response was “get out of your office and show people what you can really do! Everyone already knows you are good at contracts and technology. What they don’t know is that you could be CEO, so show them that!” The day after I got the dream job, which reported directly to the CEO, and before I had even settled in with my coffee, my partner in life and cat parenting called me and asked “what did you do to get the CEO job today?”

This leads to an often overlooked topic on the personal side of career planning. A lot of my friends and colleagues complain about their partner’s support of their careers (or lack thereof), which is often only important after the house stuff is handled and the kids are fed. To me, the best partner should want more for you than you would dare to dream for yourself. They are not concerned with being overshadowed, or allowing you to be in the spotlight. They pick up the slack when you need to focus elsewhere. They feed your stomach, your heart, and your mind. Conversely, that same great partner will appreciate and respect your decision when you are ready to say “this is enough. I’m happy here.” Anything less is not worth having. There is an old Harvard Business Review article titled “If You Can’t Find a Spouse Who Supports Your Career, Stay Single.” Truer words have never been spoken.

But to wrap up the topic at hand, look beyond technical skills and don’t get distracted by the connection you feel to potential hires that are a lot like you. Instead, opt for the Sesame Street “one of these things is not like the other” model for hiring and leading and build your “band” to be the best it can be. 

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For a different perspective on soft skills, and how to teach them if you cannot hire for them, check out In Search of Soft Skills.

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Curious about the album that inspired this post? Check out Rabbit Dog, Volume One on Spotify, for an unusual blend of punk and country that, at minimum, belongs in an episode of Yellowstone (I think there is a barrel racing, fight, or rodeo scene with their name on it). If Black Flag and Merle Haggard adopted a puppy together, it befriended a Stray Cat, and the pair made an album, you would have Rabbit Dog. And yes, my Tennessee friends, this particular dog DOES hunt.

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